F you.

'Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you very very mu-u-u-ch'.



You may have watched the video of the week (13.11.09) already and recognise those lyrics. My friend EC sent me this video calling it 'cute', and I expected another of her chipmunk (or something) videos, so you can imagine my surprise when I watched the vid. Plus, I opened it when my dad was having dinner in the room, and when it got to the chorus, it took me a whole five minutes to realise I had to close the damn window. Woopsies.

As I listened to it I thought I recognised the singer as Lily Allen. But I doubted it would be her because I wouldn't usually associate her (a mainstream-ish singer) with the LGBT scene. It turns out that it is her. I don't know why I found it weird; it must be because I see the LGBT scene and the mainstream scene as quite separate, seeing as the mainstream scene is just that homophobic. It could be said that you often see gays in the M scene, but get real – when have the depictions of gays been anything but a camp gay guy with a lisp? I've mentioned this in an earlier post, but in a documentary by the BBC (that featured one of my friends), it was made clear that people in Britain have gross misconceptions of homosexuality, and even more of queer-ness.

The video is, indeed, really cute, and I have not been able to get the song out of my head (yep, it's only in my head, cause I can't sing it aloud when surrounded by fam). And it's funny, especially the bit when one of the guy starts kick his legs up in can-can style. It's just that idea of playing up the gay-ness to rub it into the homophobes' faces isn't it. But most importantly, it's telling you homophobes to suck it up and come to terms with bloody sexuality. I was thinking about this the other day: people say 'I'm not secure about my sexuality'. But people aren't secure about sexuality in general either. Maybe I'm just making things up. Am I mistaken, though, that being insecure about one's own sexuality means not being certain that one is heterosexual and being afraid of being homosexual because of the mockery that that will attract? And that being insecure about sexuality in general means being uncomfortable with the fact that there is a whole other myriad of sexualities?

Human sexuality is just a spectrum though, not a set of categories that people should be pigeon-holed into. Well, people blatantly are pigeon-holed, and that's completely... ridiculous. It's accepted as a concrete fact that heterosexuality is the norm, from the very moment you see the world. Children think that a girl kissing a girl isn't something that should happen. If you're a teenager, everyone makes a big deal of homosexuality. Queers are discriminated against in the workplace. The world (or at least Britain) thinks that homosexuality is a whole other niche, that the people in that niche are 'special'. Take Dumbledore. Yeah, the Harry Potter one. People made SUCH a fat deal about his homosexuality. Then, Rowling admirably said, 'he's just a character who happens to be gay'. If you're a heterosexual, nothing's commented upon. But if you're a homosexual, then that's who you are, you're 'the gay one'. Admittedly, I can't say that I don't see my LGBT friends as 'my LGBT friends'. So, really, I'm a bloody hypocrite, aren't I.

On a sliiiightly unrelated note, I just listened to the words 'Birthday Sex'. Oh my god. The mountains of innuendo (which, thank you very much, I GET!) in there are unbelievable. And I can't believe I never heard the quieter singing of 'I'm gon' hit the G-spot, G-spot'. Just, oh my god. I'm gobsmacked. I knew what the song was about, but I never realised how explicit it was! How is that song even allowed on national radio?!

And I looked up the full lyrics. Jeez.

Yeah, yeah, yeah

{Verse 1}

It's your birthday so I know
you want to riiide out,
Even if we only go to myyy house
Sip mo- weezy as we sit upon myyy couch
Feels good, but I know you want to
cryyy out
You say you want passion
I think you found it
Get ready for action
Don't be astounded
We switchin' positions
You feel surrounded
Tell me where you want
your gift, girl


{Chorus}

Girl you know I-I-I
Girl you know I-I-I
I've been feenin'
Wake up in the late night...dreamin' about your lovin'
Girl you know I-I-I
Girl you know I-I-I
Don't need candles or cake
just need your body to make good

Birthday sex
Birthday sex

It's the best day of the year, girl

Birthday sex
Birthday sex

It feels like, feels like... lemme hit that...g-spot g-spot

{Verse 2}

See you sexy and them jeans got me
on 10
1-2-3, think I got you pinned
Don't tap out...fight until the end
Ring that bell; we gon start over again
We grindin' wit passion, cuz it's yo birthday
Been at it for hours...I know you thirsty
You kiss me so sweetly...taste just like Hershey's
Just tell me how you want yo gift, girl

{Chorus}

{Verse 3}

First I'm gonna take a dive into the water deep until I know I pleased
that body (body ah oop)
Or girl without a broom
I might just sweep you off your feet
And make you wanna tell somebody
(body, how I do)
somebody body how i do
Or maybe we can float on top my water bed you close your eyes as i impry between your legs
We work our way from kitchen stoves, and tables
Girl you know I'm more than able to please, yeah
Say you wanted flowers on the bed (on the bed)
But you got me and now it's on again

{Chours) (it's the best day of the year, girl)
(lemme know what it feels like, feels like, when I hit that G-spot, G-spot)

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The choon is great. But the idea...

I actually had a full discussion with my friend AM about this. I was the conservative grandma. I just hate how – especially in R'n'B by male artists – sex is so carelessly portrayed. It's so completely devalued nowadays, and I'm not advocating a reversal to the olden times where anyone who had sex outside/before marriage were outright criminals, but come on... have some self-respect. God, I sound like one of those lameo girls who think 'Awh, I'm saving my first time for that special boy'... And now I sound like a nymphomaniac. Errrr.....

Gah, as DS put it: why do I even bother with a sense of morality?!

xxxx

p.s. jeez i go on bloody rants about LGBT issues don't I...

my life is mighty exciting

Right. So as sky-high figures of people tell me they read my blog (haha, I'm so narcissistic, and I'm so kidding myself), I definitely have to step up my game. You might have noticed a slight change in the layout of my blog. I've got Dante Araujo to thank for designing the basic template. I'm now officially in love with my blog (gahhhhh stop this self-love immediately).

My life is so not worth describing right now. It's just work work work, read read read, blogwrite blogwrite blogwrite. Ok how many of my recent posts have been about school?! The most frequent post tag is 'school'. Oh I am just so cool. That rhymes. (Haha, that just reminds me - we're currently studying Hamlet in English, and in our lesson yesterday, the teacher asked 'who's in the mood to read Gertrude?' There was a ten-second pause, then I said aloud 'that rhymes'. Oh lord, what's wrong with me?)

Blah. So I'm blog-subject-less today.

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I could go on.. but I won't. O. M. G. I am so bored.

Oh! thought of something – I HATE MATHS.

Maths coursework could replace taser guns for the purpose of freakin putting us to sleep with a freakin violence degree of 100. That did not make any sense. This is what IB does to you. Or.. it's just me. I'm literally rambling now. Why can't I do this in interviews?!

Speaking of interviews, in my Extended Essay (4000 word essay we have to write for the IB diploma, no big deal) viva (some kind of post-essay-submission meetinterview) yesterday, I said 'erm' and 'like' way too many times. And was way too stuck for thoughts. That is actually how I'm going to be in interviews. 'Erm...like, you know that ting bruvz... innit that ting... basically... it's like...' Yup, that is me.

I just can't think straight in interview situations, because all I think about is saying something intelligent. Which is what would most please them, but that gets me straying from the path of 'say what you think'. But I don't know what I think because all I'm thinking about is the freakin' fact that this ting is called an 'interview'! Muaha, I'm so calm it's not even funny. Ok that phrase has to go. And so does 'like'. Help me guys...

Oh, another embarrassing moment yesterday morning, at the end of our Latin lesson, my Latin teacher asked one of the girls if she could 'have a word'. Not 'stay behind', but 'have a word'. Meanwhile, I was finishing up the bit of work we were doing in the lesson, and I saw the girl packing up so I assumed they were leaving the room to have this private convo. I sat there. And sat there. And sat there. Writing, of course, not just sitting (I'm not that much of a moron), until I sort of realised...they were waiting for me to leave. Oh joy. As I frantically left, I looked my teacher in the eyes and she kind of gave me this glare. Woops. Why do I get into these sitches...

xxxx

irata

The amount of anger I'm feeling is, admittedly, quite unreasonable; but then, isn't that what anger is? Unreasonable? And I'm only unreasonably angry because people are unreasonably ANAL.

Breathe.

Just a teacher. From my school.

Moving on; following on from yesterday's mortification (which I have totally gotten over. Totally.) people are still mocking me. Totally uncool, guys!

Haha, I really don't mind, but it just makes me really self-conscious thinking back to it..

So I was talking to a friend about it, and he joked that I should buy a book all about innuendos to educate my innocent mind. And he allegedly searched it on google (but obviously he was just looking up at his bookshelf) and gave me a list of innuendo books. One of them being Something I Said?: Innuendo And Out The Other. So yeah, you guys can now read the book in the comfort of your own home.

Thanks for lightening me up AB!

Finally, hellogoodbye are officially back, with the song 'When We First Met'. They have an EP (free on their myspace) with the same name. And here's the video for you guys:

When We First Met

hellogoodbye | MySpace Video

I have to say, I'm not mega-impressed... It doesn't leave me with anything, nor is it particularly peculiar. But ah well, it's hellogoodbye, and I love them.

xxxx

i'm just so funny

Well I've had my embarassment of the day today. I said something that I thought was funny in itself but did not realise at all that there was anunderlying innuendo. Awww, I'm so innocent.

What happened was that I had to give the vote of thanks to an external speaker who gave a talk today, about the 4th Century in ancient Athens. At one point, he talked about men who dressed up as prostitutes because they wanted to get into this place to kill people, so they had swords under their skirts. In my vote of thanks, I said something along the lines of 'I'm sure most of us here are glad we don't have men dressed up as prostitutes with swords under the skirts'. Everyone burst out laughing. I know, I'm just so funny.

But no, they laughed for the wrong reason.

Apparently I looked at my skirt when I said the skirt bit. Which makes it that tad bit worse. And yes, I only realised the innuendo when I sat down and my friend told me. Bah.

xxxx

ps the speaker was Michael Scott. Two people, including the head of Classics Soc and my Latin teacher, have said that he's fit. But...no. He was dashing but not fit. Anyway, I can't believe myself.